Michelle A. Culver, LMFTDisney’s animated feature “Frozen” presents an intriguing idea of letting go. Elsa is faced with how her powers have affected others, but she attempts to let it go, singing:
“Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door”
But can we let it go? When you have experienced various negative events in your life or caused hardship to others, do you just let it go? Or is it a process of releasing the emotional ties to the experience while the lessons learned remain? If you were to slam the door on the experience without incorporating some lesson or perspective from it, most likely you would continue to repeat the same behaviors. Maybe the letting go part is learning from experience and changing your behaviors. Every experience changes you in some small way and letting go is truly acknowledging that you are no longer the person you used to be.
Again, Elsa says it best:
“It’s funny how some distance
Makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me
Can’t get to me at all”
As you gain distance from a situation, you are able to see it for what it was. Distance and time aid in the lessening of emotion and sharpening your perspective. Maybe it is this new, less emotional perspective that allows one to release any fears and embrace the lesson. Perhaps at this point, one can truly let go of the largeness of the experience and move forward. But is this really letting go? Or are we just incorporating, adapting, and living our lives? If you are finding it hard to let go we are here to help.
By Michelle A. Culver, LMFT
(“Let It Go” lyrics by Kristen Anderson-Lopez & Robert Lopez, performed by Idina Menzel)